Are you a noisy eater?
Posted on | July 4, 2007 | 41 Comments
It doesn’t matter where – sitting on the couch in front of the TV, in an elevator, at the dinner table, or standing in line at the post office – if a person within my field of vision is eating noisily, I find myself going insane. Literally. We’re not talking a mild irritation here – an internal silent wish that the person would stop; I have to physically restrain myself from running out of the room, or, in the case of an elevator or bus, where a quick exit is less realistic, from screaming out loud in frustration. I can’t think of a habit that annoys me more in a person.
I have been afflicted with this intolerance for as long as I can remember. I am the youngest of four, and I recall as a bratty and spoilt five-year-old, I would threaten to leave the room (and actually acted on it) if my brother didn’t stop biting down on the spoon as if his life depended on it every time he ate soup. If I wasn’t only five years old at the time, and had greater powers of articulation and persuasion, as well as access to the then-non-existent Internet, I would have told him to take a leaf out of the Chinese book, and breathe in while sipping from his soup. According to the Chinese, this method prevents slurping.
Definitely the worst offences are eating cereal, munching on chips, slurping on soup, and chewing gum. I really thought that my violent reaction against noisy eating would have been something I would have grown out of by now, but no. If anything, I am even MORE intolerant now than I was when I was a child. I have more words at my disposal to lash out against the offender.
I am vaguely aware that this intolerance is not something to be proud of, and it is even quite trivial in the whole scheme of things, yet I wonder what it is that makes people eat as unabashedly loudly as they do. There are times when I even have to tell certain people in my life that I can’t watch TV with them if they plan on eating, and that kinda wreaks havoc on your recreational activities.
I’m interesting in hearing from either those who share a similar distaste for noisy eating (if so, do you know of a cure?) or better yet those who are noisy eaters themselves, who can help me understand what lies at the root of noisy eating. Is it your background? Your nationality? (I’m British, after all.) Your religion? (Just kidding.) Is it an emotional attitude towards eating that manifests itself once the food is in your mouth? (I know, I’m a freak.)
Before I sign off, I have to say that an interesting element of all this is that the only two people in the world who don’t disturb me when they are slurping or munching are my two little girls. But that’s probably because I am just so grateful that they are eating at all – they eat like birds – that I block out the noise. Hmm.
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41 Responses to “Are you a noisy eater?”
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May 13th, 2007 @ 7:25 pm
I am exaactly the same but worse, i actually cry at meal times i people are making noises and i’m not allowed to leave and eat alone. I’m only fifteen so i get forced to eat with the family. It makes me feel sick and shake, its kind of like a phobia… Isn’t it just absolutely horrible. I can’t even stand the sound of my own eating, but i can manage to eat quietly by letting the food mellow in my mouth. I don’t understand why people can’t just refrain from usuing straws, slurping, crunching, opening their mouths and (this one sounds silly but) breathing around me!
Ahhh i’m getting tense just writing this haha. Email back…any luck in finding a cure!?!
Amy
May 13th, 2007 @ 10:11 pm
Amy, that’s awful. I totally hear you. I guess one approach could be, if you can’t beat em, join em, and eat as loud or louder than they do??
Either that, or when you do move out of home one day, invest in a really long table, so that you can be on the other side of the table.
Seriously, though, I really do empathize. People laugh at me when I tell them how much it bothers me, so it’s nice to know that I am not the only one:-)
May 17th, 2007 @ 7:23 am
I agree enirely. When I read your first paragraph, it was great to realize someone has the same feeling. And I beat myself up for it. I think, “I shouldn’t care so much about this.” I also notice it’s worse if I haven’t gotten enough sleep or for some reason am more generally irritable.
I don’t know if it’s something that needs a “cure”, which often implies we need a drug or something that can make us not care. I do however want to know why we have this intense irritation with it, and why other people don’t even notice. Hell, I’d go for just an effective way to communicate it to people without making them all defensive and offended.
May 17th, 2007 @ 8:35 pm
Brian: Thanks for coming by. I too wonder why I am the one who freaks out at the table, while everyone else continues eating, happily oblivious. I feel pretty bad cuz my husband eats loudly, and I KNOW he is not doing it to annoy me, but it drives me insane!
June 17th, 2007 @ 12:18 am
Im so glad others feel this too, when it happens to me i feel like slapping the person doing it and punching anything within my reach, it really bothers me and i feel so vicious at times!
June 21st, 2007 @ 2:35 am
THIS IS BY NO MEANS AN UNCOMMON CONDITION.REST ASSURED WE ARE MANY.ITS IRRATIONAL THOUGH! IS IT MY PROBLEM? OR THE PROBLEM OF THE NOISY EATERS? THEY DONT SEEM TO CARE. ITS SO BAD WITH ME THAT EVEN THE SIGHT OF SOMEONES MOUTH GRINDING AWAY OUT OF EARSHOT TURNS MY SOUL TO A CAULDRON OF SEETHING HATE. AND I’M A NICE GUY! HONEST. I HAVE EVEN SUBCATEGORIZED THE VARIOUS SIGHTS SOUNDS ONE ENCOUNTERS IN DAILY LIFE, INCLUDING;
SLURPING-a tight-lippedmouth emmitting a short sharp ripping sound typically from soup eater
THE BLOW N SLURP- as above but with long introductory cooling blow
AQUA GULPING- liquid contents of mouth shooting down gullet at high pressure
THROAT CLUCKING-rare and hard to describe. you’ll know it when u hear it though
CUTLERY ON TEETH
FROWNING WHILST EATING
VOCALISATIONS OF ENJOYMENT
INNER SQUELCHING-closed mouth
FINGER SUCKING
I COULD GO ON.
ON THE SUBJECT OF A CURE, THERE AINT ONE. ONCE THOUGH I TOLD MYSELF THAT THE GUY BEHIND ME ON THE BUS WASNT EATING CRISPS BUT TURNING THE PAGES OF A NEWSPAPER- A SOUND I REALLY LOVE. IT WASNT IDEAL BUT IT STOPPED ME GETTING UP AND TWATTING HIM.
THE NEAREST I HAVE COME TO EXPLAINING WHY I HATE IT IS THAT IT IS A BEHAVIOUR THAT DISREGARDS OTHERS AND THE CULPRITS SEEM SO BLIND TO THE REACTIONS OF PEOPLE LIKE US.
July 3rd, 2007 @ 1:20 pm
I agree with everything here and hate it with a violent passion. Like Andre I’m a nice guy and will go out of my way to help others but once I detect the slightest hint of chewing I go to ‘code red’ in an instant.
For me it started at the dinner table with my Dad and brother the worst offenders and my Mum to a lesser degree. I’m not sure how old I was when I first noticed it, maybe 8 or 9 but when I did I took the initiative and told my Dad straight ‘Dad, can you close your mouth when you eat as it really bugs me’ to which he replied, ‘What? I’m enjoying my food!’. [I've just spent a minute clenching my fists thinking about that!!!]and is still an inconsiderate muncher to this day. As for my brother, he got a belt from me at the first opportunity and my Mum was and still is very sympathetic to my issue so ‘behaves’ nicely when I’m around.
I’m now 35 and my wife and kids are well aware so they are also sympathetic and at work I happened across another sufferer so we share the bond of hate together. There is a coworker who is absolutely the worst offender I’ve ever heard – he’s so bad he even munches water! How is that possible? To be honest he is a hell of a lot better these days after I have told him a thousand times to STFU when eating.
As for a cure I think we are all well aware that this is a psychological issue but feel like we need or have to live with it. I mean, we can all appreciate how it seems like a none issue to none sufferers and that such an incidental, intangible noise should stir such violent, hateful emotions.
The annoying thing (apart from the condition itself lol)is that AFAIK there is no current classification for the ‘condition’ so where do you start to look for help? It’s not a phobia as it instils a feeling of rage rather than fear. I would love to be free of it but what do you do? Go to the doctor? Where do you even start to explain it without him having you sectioned under the mental health act? The other issue is that the usual treatment for phobics is ‘de-sensitivity’ therapy and that scares the shit out of me as I couldn’t be held responsible for murdering whoever tried to de-sensitise me!
A few months ago I emailed a few hypnotherapy clinics detailing the issues and feelings I go through in the hope that was the way forward and received a couple of emails that were quite vague and mentioned being able to help in the inner rage side of things but not enough to make me take any further action down that route although I’m still of the mind that it would probably be the way to go.
Over the years I seem to have become less tolerant and will just stand up and get the hell out of any place I need to. A story about that is when myself and the missus went to one of the kids end of year play and in one scene about 20 kids had to pretend to be eating sweets (!!!I know!!!!!!). Well there they were all making extra loud noise (to get the point across – I know!!!) and my missus looked at me with a ‘please contain yourself’ look of pleading, dread and sympathy and I looked back with an incredulous look of ‘is this for real’ rising to ‘AAAARGH STFU’ and then it went silent and they moved on. So I’m sat there clenched, fuming and shocked that the bloody teachers would write something like that into a play and calming myself down telling myself that it’s over and calm down (why is it that after the noise abates you still hear it in your head, over and over?)
Anyway, after a few minutes I’m returning to a calmer state when they do it again! That’s it for me I shoot straight up and pace straight out of the building and have to stay out for 10 minutes trying to chill out.
That’s me anyway and I hope you can relate to things I’ve said.
I wish you all peace and quiet.
Matt.
July 3rd, 2007 @ 1:23 pm
Apologies for the long ranting comment above BTW but I’m glad to get it off my chest!
Matt.
July 3rd, 2007 @ 2:53 pm
[...] but that’s record-breaking on Double Take) I still receive about the problem. Here it is again. The people who commented seem to suffer even worse than I do, and I thought I had it bad. One [...]
July 4th, 2007 @ 9:12 am
I live in Oshawa Ontario Canada and work in Markham – North of Toronto. There is a major Chinese community here – i work for a very large IT company and there are many cultures in the building. I do not do to the cafe to have lunch anymore as i can’t stand the noise they make when they eat!!! I find it so disgusting and they don even care. It’s bad enough that they make no effort to speak English – they slurp, suck, grunt and all other kinds of Godly irritating noise!!!!
Am i racist? I work well with them – just cant be anywhere near them when they eat!!! – I feel so bad! I just want to scream – CLOSE YOUR GOD DAMM MOUTH!
August 22nd, 2007 @ 11:36 am
I googled “noisy eater” and found this. I am not usually that bothered by other people’s table manners, but I have this Indian man sitting across from me at work who eats like a pig. He takes 5 hours to eat his lunch (yes 5 hours – not an exaggeration), which is usually soup (yes it must be stone cold). I quietly told him once that he is distracting as he eats noisly and he was receptive to my complaint but unfortunately thought it only related to his slurping. Now he still makes loud clucking noises (whilst nodding his head) with every mouthful and this goes on for 5 hours, he takes one mouthful every 5 minutes. What makes it worse is no-one else seems to be bothered by him.
I feel I have been tolerant with the fact he clicks his fingers and plays his music loud enough for me to hear, but this drives me mad. It’s the disrespect that aggravates.
He has 7 days left of his contract but I am not sure I can last out – should tell him again?
May 12th, 2008 @ 10:29 pm
I am glad to find that there are other people with this issue. I have been “suffering” from this pet peeve for as long as I can remember. My entire family eats noisily and I am sure that it stems from some sort of irritation with that when I was little. I am a very nice person as well, but I sense extreme rage whenever I am within distance of noisy eaters. It is definately worse if I have no escape root. I think that there is an additional sense of rage added due to the fact that others seem oblivious to what is typically the loudest sound in the room. I get so frustrated that people can not consider the noise that they are making and the distraction that it causes. But, why are others not distracted? The worst instance I can remember happened in a college class that covered spanish art. At one point, the class was treated to an early nineteenth century silent film by Luis Bunuel. During this film, several people ate chips and chewed gum and slurpped coffe at such an astonishingly loud level that I thought my eyes would bug out of my head. It ruined the experience and infuriates me to this day. But my question was, how were others not angered as well? It was like watching an art movie with a score of smacking, slurping and crunching and even a burp. I can understand maybe people not noticing while they are eating as well, but how did they all overlook this? Was that room silent to them? My point is that the most frustrating thing about this pet peeve is that it is hard to realize that it isn’t the norm when it feels like it should be. I assume that if I walked around with a chalk-board and some forks and scratched it as people went about their business that they would not be able to drown it out. Even ones that don’t mind that scratch sound, would probably start to mind if I did it during that movie. If I had made any other sound, (a banging or a whistle) that loud I would have been asked to stop. But eating and coffee slurping at that level is completely overlooked.
I have also noticed that I can turn on other quiet eaters to the pet peeve, but they do not notice it until I point it out. It will slowly develop over time. I have converted two or three friends. I seriously think that as much as you could say that it is a psychological problem that it exists for me, it is also psychological that others don’t notice. I belive that most people would say a room was dead silent if asked because they would look for other sounds other than a person standing there chewing their gum like a cow. Others don’t acknowledge it as noise for some reason that I am extremely jealous of.
Thanks for letting me get that off my chest!
May 12th, 2008 @ 10:29 pm
I am glad to find that there are other people with this issue. I have been “suffering” from this pet peeve for as long as I can remember. My entire family eats noisily and I am sure that it stems from some sort of irritation with that when I was little. I am a very nice person as well, but I sense extreme rage whenever I am within distance of noisy eaters. It is definately worse if I have no escape root. I think that there is an additional sense of rage added due to the fact that others seem oblivious to what is typically the loudest sound in the room. I get so frustrated that people can not consider the noise that they are making and the distraction that it causes. But, why are others not distracted? The worst instance I can remember happened in a college class that covered spanish art. At one point, the class was treated to an early nineteenth century silent film by Luis Bunuel. During this film, several people ate chips and chewed gum and slurpped coffe at such an astonishingly loud level that I thought my eyes would bug out of my head. It ruined the experience and infuriates me to this day. But my question was, how were others not angered as well? It was like watching an art movie with a score of smacking, slurping and crunching and even a burp. I can understand maybe people not noticing while they are eating as well, but how did they all overlook this? Was that room silent to them? My point is that the most frustrating thing about this pet peeve is that it is hard to realize that it isn’t the norm when it feels like it should be. I assume that if I walked around with a chalk-board and some forks and scratched it as people went about their business that they would not be able to drown it out. Even ones that don’t mind that scratch sound, would probably start to mind if I did it during that movie. If I had made any other sound, (a banging or a whistle) that loud I would have been asked to stop. But eating and coffee slurping at that level is completely overlooked.
I have also noticed that I can turn on other quiet eaters to the pet peeve, but they do not notice it until I point it out. It will slowly develop over time. I have converted two or three friends. I seriously think that as much as you could say that it is a psychological problem that it exists for me, it is also psychological that others don’t notice. I belive that most people would say a room was dead silent if asked because they would look for other sounds other than a person standing there chewing their gum like a cow. Others don’t acknowledge it as noise for some reason that I am extremely jealous of.
Thanks for letting me get that off my chest!
December 30th, 2008 @ 1:13 pm
I understand fully what you are all talking about and nobody seems to care youre absolutely right and it drives me absolutely mad..! nobody seems to truly understand, rather they say that they are listening to you complaints..BUT! but they dont think that your complaints deserves respect, they dont think that it is something that should be taken so seriously as to be a valid and actual nuisance. Instead, they freak back in your face with just as much irritation on the matter, or they laugh in your face. Even to the point where it actually becomes a full fledged argument. I dont understand why it has to be that way…do i have to seek revenge? NO of course not! I try to seemingly get their attention even if i have to shed tears for them to understand..though usually only works on family members…I wouldnt suggest it in public as to not make your self look like you escaped the looney bin! Know what else actually works… Showing others this site, helping them to realize that we do not stand alone..instead we are all plagued with this undying issue til the day we die! What on earth do we do besides besides rip our hair out and pray that God will take away our anxiety? I really need to learn some coping skills for this because as for now I am certainly on the losing streak..how about you guys?? Hopefully when i get married it will be one of their vows..to be extremely sensitive to my most hopeless pet peeves…:(
Sincerely, Tasha Dawn
December 30th, 2008 @ 4:16 pm
I suffer to the point that I threaten tea slurping colleges with pens. I have a theory about this which may only apply to me. The key observation is that a) the disproportionately intense heightening of the rage if the noise is done intentionally to annoy you. In fact, by reading the comments on this blog, I can almost feel my problem getting worse. In other words, noticing how angry it makes you makes it considerably worse and is actually the perpetuating force behind it.
The point is that the sound itself is not implicitly the cause of the rage but the association of someone else disturbing you by making it. This seems an oversimple, but by now every time I hear even a recorded or accidental slurp, there are so many levels of repressed rage sandwiched with indignancy that it triggers a reaction without there being any intent at all.
It would be interesting to know how many of the people on this wall have NOT had someone irritate them by making the noise on purpose or have NOT felt indignant that someone might be doing it on purpose.
The more I think about it the more complicated it seems. Maybe its incurable and I should just get a a tee-shirt explaining the risk to those who slurp within stabbing distance of me.
January 2nd, 2009 @ 3:46 pm
I really like this guy I have been friends with for about 4 years. We get along really well, and he has asked me out a couple of times.
I have always worried (and still do) that this is such a mean-spirited, shallow reason to NOT be with someone, but the way he eats drives me mad.
It has reached the point where I will make an excuse to leave the room when he’s eating.
Unlike a lot of the examples here, he doesn’t eat with an open mouth, but still somehow manages to make a LOT of noise. Like he is squishing and squelching the food around in his mouth and then swallows it loudly. I never knew it was possible to hear a person swallowing from across the room until I ate with him….
It’s a serious problem because I really like him. He’s such a totally lovely person and I know he must have no idea about how much noise he makes (especially since his mouth is closed, he must think he couldn’t possibly be making much sound).
He’s also a very sensitive person and I have no idea how I could ever tell him how much I hate the way he eats. I have been on the verge of telling him a few times, but always held back because I’m so worried it will hurt him and he will feel humiliated.
I try so hard to just tune it out, or I turn up the TV volume if I can. Another part of the problem is that he prefers not to have the TV on during dinner. Aaargh. So once or twice I’ve lied and said there is some show on that I really want to see…
Funny thing is, eating sounds never bothered me until I met him. His eating noises are just so strange and awful… they bother me more and more all the time.
Oh well… just venting here. I feel your pain!
January 16th, 2009 @ 10:08 pm
At this exact moment… I am in HELL. This feels like a support group so I’ll start from the beginning. It started when I was 9 years old. My family was camping in Monaco in a super crowded parking-lot-like camp ground. So, we all sat in our van and ate the hamburgers my dad got from some local fast food joint. My grandmother has dentures and was making some sort of smacking slurpy noise. I was literally trapped in a van in a foreign country and could not leave. I have never so bad in my life wanted to scratch someone’s eyeballs out. Since then it’s been the same old story. If I don’t notice I’m fine, but as soon as I take note of it, I get obsessed and listen for it! It’s like I want to drive myself crazy!?! I once gave a good friend so many dirty looks, sighs, and snide comments, she felt bad (for my irrational behavior) wrapped up her burrito, put it in the trash, and left the room. Please though – if you can’t eat refried beans without smacking, don’t even go there. This brings me to right now. I work in a small windowless room with 2 other people. About 2-3 times a day one officemate, an otherwise nice person, will grab a Dr. Pepper and a small bag of chips. While he works he SLURPS his soda, open mouth CRUNCHES his chips and then BURPS. It is driving me crazy! “Slurp, crunch, slurp, burp. And Repeat…” It’s like he was suckling off the damn soda! I’ve tried to replicate this noise and I can’t! It’s insanely loud!!! How can one person have so much gas? How does his wife live with him? He doing it right now and I needed to focus on something else. This is why I’m here. What do I do? I don’t want to hurt his feelings and I don’t want to come off crazy. It’s just a matter of time till I jump off the roof or shoot him. Any ideas other than a baby bottle cap and some gas-x anonymously placed on his desk (he’ll totally know it’s me)?
January 19th, 2009 @ 11:06 pm
I found this article today because my roommate at college is eating and drinking right now. I have told him that he eats loudly and that it annoys me but to no avail. He started smacking his tongue against his palate and his lips and then he took a drink and slurped it down. I went apeshit and I honestly was about to flip out. I instead put on my noise-canceling headphones…it didn’t work so I then turned on the music and I am now blasting music into my head so I don’t have to hear that devil sound! AHHHHH!
I either put on headphones or I usually leave the room when I eat with him…my other 2 roommates don’t bother me when they eat.
January 19th, 2009 @ 11:45 pm
I can’t believe I actually found other people with this same problem! I’m so relieved.
After yet another excruciating visit with my parents and in particular my noisy eating father, I have come home and googled “noisy eating” at my wit’s end.
I’ve suffered with this for most of my life -I must have been about 10 years old when I first realised his obnoxious eating habits were grating on my nerves. Since then, it has become much worse. I literally dread sitting a table with him. I sit as far away as possible from him, I even try and have doors and windows open in the vain hope of bringing some extra noise into the room to drown out his eating noise. My mother is strict about the tv being left on, if I could leave that on too believe me – I would!
I’m 41 years old now and I HATE his eating! It just makes me sick and I get so uptight and anxious listening to it I just cannot relax. I spend the entire mealtime avoiding eye contact with him, ignoring him, suffering at the other end of the table and feeling like his noiy chewing and slurping is going to make me sick.
I even had a go at him this weekend about his talking with his mouth full. He always does this but it’s gotten worse as he’s aged. It’s just so disgusting, he doesn’t even bother to hide the food, just opens his big mouth with food inside it and talks and chews noisily with his mouth open. I feel sick. I’d had enough, and I asked him to stop talking with his mouth full as it sets a bad example to my young children (who were also at the table). The end result? World War 3 with my mother, who completely lost it with me because “I’m not perfect”.
I just hate eating with him because of the disgusting noise. It’s really affected my life as I completely avoid family occasions.
If this is a phobia, then why doesn’t it have a name?
I think that anyone else reading this page would think we’re all mad. I mean, it doesn’t make sense? My reaction to noisy eating is plain irrational, yet I can’t control the feelings of anger and revulsion that come over me when I hear my dad (or anyone else) eating like a pig.
January 22nd, 2009 @ 1:39 am
I can really relate and empathize with all you have said. i too once found noisy eating unbearable to the point of wanting to kill… But i now no longer notice it at all and in fact i have been accused of being a noisy eater myself. I have no idea how i became “cured” and i didnt even realize or know when it happened….but what made me realize i was, was when my daughter developed the same problem….she too now cannot cope with noisy eating and she pointed out that i was a noisy eater, i then realised that i no longer notice people who eat noisily and that i was cured. I wish i could give you an answer to how i became cured but i really dont know how it happened. I wish i had some answers or know where to look for help for my daughter. i can totally empathize with her but i find myself getting frustrated with her because now i try so hard to eat quietly to the point where i cant eat near her for fear i might upset her, i cant even hear myself being noisy but i see her become irritated, cover her ears etc. i am paranoid about eating near her now and when i do eat within her earshot i am trying so hard not to be noisy that i am no longer enjoying what i am eating, so i stop eating what i am eating and i have also had times of nearly choking and painful swallowing whilst i try to change even the way i eat. i dont know what to do, i dont know how to be even quieter and i dont know how to help her…..noone else in the family can hear that i am eating noisily she is just so sensitive to even the slightest of noise at all which is completely difficult to totally erradicate, its not humanly possible to be completely silent while eating because there is movement of the mouth and jaw. i know how hard it is to tolerate but please be aware that people arent necessarily trying to be rude when they eat noisily, its just something that they arent aware of, you dont even realize you are doing it, and its not always easy to change the way or habit of the way in which you eat so you do slip back into old habits of being noisy at times, until you learn and remember not to be noisy. people arent necessarily intetionally trying to make your life a living hell. i have lived both sides of the fence and i have no answers….but maybe if i can be cured, then there is hope for you all.
January 22nd, 2009 @ 2:30 am
I myself also hate noisy eating. I don’t point it out to people for fear of hurting their feelings. I have pointed it out to my mother though, and now she is trying hard to eat quietly but I can still here her. Yes, the person called Cate is my mother. I have been on another site as well as this one and found that on both websites, people tend to fill with rage and start arguments unintentionally. I’m 13 and have suffered, or in better terms, been in tune to and annoyed with the noise since I was nine.
I don’t have any answers but I can point out somethings that I have noticed.
firstly, I noticed that we tend to feel violent and want ‘scratch their eyeballs out’. Some people choose to show our annoyance in a polite way by asking them to eat quietly or telling them that it annoys you, or you don’t want to hurt the persons feeling and make excuses to have the TV turned on, or to leave the room. Arguments are also another consequence of telling someone you don’t like the way that they eat.
Secondly, this can quite possibly be a phobia, and so possibly can be cured with phobia treatments. A phobia is strong fear or dislike: an irrational or very powerful fear and dislike of something, for example spiders or confined spaces. The description doesn’t relate to us exactly by the terms of the strong fear, but we do have a strong dis-like for the way certain people eat. It’s the closest thing I have actually come to.
Thirdly, some may not notice it at first, but as soon as someone points it out, or you realize or remember, you instantly start to listen for those noises that annoy.
I can’t think of anything else at the moment but if I do I will try and post it here.
January 22nd, 2009 @ 2:35 am
Sorry I also forgot to mention that the people who are trying hard for us to not eat noisily is would also be having a hard time as they may be used to eating noisily and people not noticing.
Also, I don’t know how it’s possible but I seem to hear things others can’t. If you notice this for yourself or in other people post it here so I can research in to it a bit more. I don’t know whether it’s just that I/we have a higher sense in hearing, therefore we can notice the others around us that eat so noisily, or unless if I/we just notice things more.
January 24th, 2009 @ 9:29 pm
Oh wow. Here I thought I was the only one who had this problem! I wont get into details because frankly my story sounds like many of the ones above. I’ve been annoyed by noisy eaters for as long as I can remember and it never gets better. I am amazed by the sounds people are able to make, eating all sorts of things, even things that shouldn’t make any sound at all. It gives me anxiety and I obsess over it. Also, I feel guilty about being so nit picky about it. Where did this phobia come from?
February 3rd, 2009 @ 7:34 pm
I have the same problem. Have had it since I was a kid. I have learned to deal with it by carrying those waxy earplugs in my purse. Anytime I go to a mexican restaurant or a movie theater I will put them in my ears. It blocks out all unecessary noise. Hope this helps. they are 6.99 at the drugstores and comes with 4 pairs which last throughout the month. On the plane, I travel alot I actually just listen to my ipod. But most def. the earplugs are hidden and no as rude!
February 16th, 2009 @ 12:41 pm
There is a support group for this problem on Yahoo message boards – here is the link. It’s called Selective Sound Sensitivity Syndrome (4S) or Misophonia. The group is run by a doctor who named the disorder. It’s a very helpful group for people who suffer from this sound sensitivity. The group has over 800 members.
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/Soundsensitivity/?v=1&t=search&ch=web&pub=groups&sec=group&slk=1#ans
April 27th, 2009 @ 12:25 pm
I am so relieved to read that its not just me. I never really had issues with this until I got together with my husband. The first time I ate with him I thought he was a bit uncouth at eating. But there is so much I love about him, I feel this is too small to make a big deal of. But I find its much worse when we have salad. The crunching and swallowing and slurping are much more noticable. Trouble is, he shovels food in without swallowing his previous mouthful first, which means opening his mouth while eating. He fills up and then has to sit back and rest a moment while he chomps all the food he’s accumulated. He’s a noisy, mouth open, gum chewer too. I get embarrassed for him because it must be noticable to others, surely! My daughters have also commented on it, without me raising it at all, so I don’t think its a phobia actually. I try to be kind and just tell him to slow down, but really the problem is the noise, exacerbated by the shoveling approach. What I want to know is how to tell him, without him feeling picked on or terribly hurt, because I really do love him. The fact that I’ve googled it today points out to me that I can’t keep quiet much longer. I sometimes spend hours pondering what to do, which, while this isn’t a marriage threatening problem, I know very soon he will notice my preoccupation and ask what’s wrong, as he’s so sensitive to my moods, and we’re usually so honest with each other, and good talkers. This one, though, is doing my head in! Any suggestions?
May 12th, 2009 @ 12:56 am
Hey I am with you guys. I live in Sydney and suffer terribly from being irritated by eating noises in the office place. What peeves me off the most are these people that insist on slurping their breakfast cereal at their desks in the morning, plus the incessant clang clatter clang noise of spoons on bowls as they slurp up the last remains of their milk and whatever the heck they are finishing off.
I work in the marketing industry and I think they see it as “cool” that they are so busy that they “only have time to eat breakfast” at work. I see it as slightly arrogant and wanting to be seen as putting the hours in. From my observations this behaviour is particularly prevalent in younger Gen Y women, but I could be wrong…
May 13th, 2009 @ 12:30 pm
all these sounds made by people around us and these sounds come from from acts of self-assuredness and confidence.since people with anxiety and low self esteem dont have self-assuredness,they hate when they see or hear other people act with self assuredness.
i have gone overboard and hate myself,when i make same sounds wile eating .. i even hate others sighing,typings loudly in keyboard..in childhood, i remember, i had cried in am big family function during meal time.i also dont like salivating,and for this reason,i just dont brush,and only use mouthwash..after very long time,at my age 26 or so, i realised that i lack self-esteem.it continues to this day…i hate even when people give out that “ahhh..” – thinking sound..
July 9th, 2009 @ 3:59 pm
I too have this problem and it has always been there. I have had arguments in banks in shops on buses when people eat loudly near me. I am now so intolerant that i no longer eat with my family. This is hard as I am a grown women with 4 children. There is no answer as far as I know I cant even stand it when people hold a glass to there lips for longer than you need to. or those people who hold there hot drinks with two hands while they drink it. arghhhhhhhhh. I have passed this hatred on to my son now who is 11 I hate myself for this but there is just no way i can contain it. it sucks
April 17th, 2010 @ 1:19 am
GRRR im same i have a step brother who really pisses me off wen he is eating but i cant tell him because he has ADHD and will go mental and its fucking stupid even now he is crunching on crisps :@ and even with soft foods he somehow still makes a squelching noise ,, ive told him before but he never seems to listen he just argues back
good to see other people sufer it too
May 5th, 2010 @ 11:38 pm
[...] http://www.flowingpens.com/blog/?p=56 [...]
May 6th, 2010 @ 12:08 am
It’s so great to find out that I’m not alone in this. All of these descriptions sound so close to what I’m trying to cope with. I too read about Selective Sound Sensitivity Syndrome, and it sounds identical to this problem and I figure it’s what people like us must “have” or whatnot (http://www.tinnitus-audiology.com/softsound.html).
For me, I’ve had this problem since I was young, but it has grown incredibly bad in the past year or so. I can only attribute it to two things:
(1) A coworker I sit *kind-of* near smacks his food incredibly loud, for several hours over lunchtime each day. Maybe this particular person has finally turned this condition of mine from strong annoyance to pure torture? Naturally it’s not only worse hearing this eater, but around everyone else too. I’ve also noticed my sensitivity to related-sounds (‘attacking the spoon’ and jaw cracking while yawning) has intensified. I was strongly annoyed before (angry, obsessed, etc), now I feel violent, physically ill, and the very strong desire to flee.
(2) I have less overall stress in my life, so maybe now I’m more open to this particular stress? Things were particularly bad, and now that those issues are pretty much resolved, I noticed my sensitivity to eating sounds grew much worse than they have been for the past 25 years…
Maybe it’s a combination of all of the above.
Anyway, I found this blog post after noticing visitors to my own blog post on this topic using the same search terms, and it’s a nice answer to some of the questions I was posing about whether or not I was alone (I only have one comment! So this feedback is awesome, what I was looking for). Thanks to the original poster and all the commenters for sharing your stories.
June 4th, 2010 @ 10:28 pm
I am the same way. I actually found this website by googling “how to tell your co-worker to stop eating like a pig”.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not the constant eating that bugs me… it’s the chewing with your mouth wide open, eating crunchy nuts all day, scraping her teeth against the fork every single time she takes a bite of food, scraping the fork/spoon against the bottom of the glass bowl, making sure she got every last, loud, obnoxious bite out of the way. I don’t know what to do. I’m running out of patience. This girl sits in the cube right behind me, so this isn’t something I can just walk away from. She’s not a fat girl, she eats healthy, but she eats ALL day long…and I’m not exaggerating. I have came very close, many times, to saying to her what I say to my friends…”that sounds really disgusting” “is that good?!” “chew with your mouth closed”…etc. I don’t know what to do. She’s fairly new at work so I’m too nervous to say anything to her, worried that I may offend her. But I can not take this any longer. Any suggestions…anyone?
June 5th, 2010 @ 2:33 pm
I’m SOOO glad to find others who share this irritation! My partner is the worst eater I have met. You name it he does it – like someone else previously commented I cannot stay in the same room as him when he eats. I purposely choose restaurants that are busy and have loud music so that I don’t have to hear his extremely loud eating noises. It drives me insane that I feel this way. It drives me insane!
July 15th, 2010 @ 11:29 pm
Finally…I am not alone, what a relief!!!I don’t even remember having this problem, it just came and now i’m stuck. Everyday, I suffer with this problem and my family doesn’t get it. I just get so angry everyday and scream and bang walls(the one up the staircase) and slam the door of my room. It’s so upsetting, but now every time it happens I will think of you gyus, my fellow “haters of the annoying noises” group. Thanks gyus, i’m now smilling, knowing i’m not alone!
:):)
July 15th, 2010 @ 11:30 pm
To relieve my anger I play my flute, blast music, or go for a run…hope you can find an outlet too.
July 31st, 2010 @ 8:56 pm
Haha! This thread was started in 2007 and it is still receiving comments—and it’s 2010! I suppose I’ll add my two cents. I had to laugh at a number of these posts (b/c this topic can be quite humorous when you focus on how annoying it is!). My father is the greatest offender I’ve been around (no disrespect) except for some of my cousins. It drives my brother and me nuts, and during times when we’ve just been through the noisy chewing mill and were venting our frustrations, we even attempt to replicate some of the annoying sounds–without success. Even our best fully intentional efforts have fallen short of the sounds we tried to imitate; it is beyond either one of us how anyone can make so much noise just eating!!! It must be a special talent, because I can’t make nearly as much noise even when I try my hardest (just replicative venting of frustration)–if it’s genetic, at least I don’t have the genes for the inconsiderate behavior. The most annoying part of it is that my father doesn’t just make the noises when he eats (which is bad enough). He makes lip smacking-heavy breathing sounds while idling; they drive me insane! I have to get up and leave sometimes because I can’t stand it! Watching movies is sometimes unbearable; every five seconds–smack—smack—smack. . .(scream)! I could go on, but I’ve felt the same was as the 101 posters before me, so there wouldn’t be much point saying the same thing. The only other thing that is a co-irritant is when I don’t receive any sympathy/understanding (my sister/mother). I guess their immune to impolite inconsiderate table manners. Not me!
August 23rd, 2010 @ 1:15 pm
Ugh. I am 14, my brother is 12. He eats SOO noisily, it makes me feel really sick and i cant stand it.. i just want to run out the room, if i cant, id jst smack him to make him stop eating and get out the room. i hate it. I want to know a way to block it out.. but i can hear it over music through headphones, i cant eat in the same room as him.
August 23rd, 2010 @ 2:32 pm
I have this bad! ive had it as long as i can remember when i wanted to violently attack my mum for making noises when eating when i was 5. The violent impulses are still there but once the anger builds up, and it does…VERY quickly, i have to get up and leave before i fly into a rage.
As you say its small in the scheme of things but at the time it doesnt feel like that
September 3rd, 2010 @ 12:05 am
HEEELP! My toddler is driving me insane! It is a comfort to know l am not alone in the STFU catagory for noisy eaters and this has affected me since childhood to the point where l have fallen out with friends cos of their disgusting eating habit, Although l do understand not everyone is affected by this awful syndrome l have no idea why it winds me up so much it is nice to know l am not alone. It is only recently l have noticed my toddler eating with her mouth open and making noises simular to an animal and cannot understand why l havent noticed it before and it isnt every mealtime that it bothers me l occasionally put the Tv on to drown out the noise but She is so fixated on watching She forgets to eat! PROBLEM SOLVED! lol Maybe the suggestion of hypnotherapy would work and might look into this if the relationship with my daughter begins to suffer l would hate to pass this snydrome onto Her Thankyou everyone for your comments l really thought l was crazy its a comfort to know l am not alone but then again maybe were all mental!!!! xxxx
September 3rd, 2010 @ 1:46 pm
A co-worker and I have to put up with a crunch-munching bog-trotter troll all week; and one thing he does that actually adds to our hatred of his eating habits is that he eats the SAME thing at the SAME time EVERY day. I jest not, every f**king day at 10.35am he chomps and slurps his way through a manky, rat-like turkey breast, followed by an apple (which he irritatingly peels the label off – even that’s eardrum-shattering!) and a yoghurt. It all makes for a disharmonious, stomach-churning and nerve-grating schlop-a-thon. He nibbles at his turkey breast like a weasel on a corn cob, then he takes gnashing swipes at his apple like a shark – his record is TWELVE successive chomps in one go! Apple dispatched, he makes a start on his yoghurt. He peels the lid back an inch, SLURPS on the tiny hole, rips the lid off and just slobbers his way to the bottom of the pot, squelching and felching all the way. Dirty, scrubby oaf.
12.45pm rolls around; out comes the roadkill baguette. I’m actually gagging inbetween seeing the red mist descend as I type this!
Picture this nauseating concoction rotting in his stomach, because we get it first-hand…he farts and burps with relish for the rest of the day. Indeed many people have commented on how the office smells like a stable.
It is revolting and enraging. He’s a disgusting excuse for a human. He’s more animal than humanoid. Ignorant as the day is long, like all noisy b@stard eaters!
Horrendous, washing-machine-sounding chomp-gimp. DIE!!!!
There is NO excuse.
Noisy eaters belong in a zoo.
Aaaaand…relax!